so tired

MERRY CHRISTMAS

We have had a busy holiday season so far and it is only Christmas day !

The boys have had 4 Christmas' so far

and they still have another one to go with antronka

thank goodness it doesn't usually happen till February.

I might just have put everything away by then

We hope that you have all had

a great Christmas

and get plenty of rest before you have to o back to school or work

People in today's world just don't care for others . It is hard find people now a days that care for anyone other then themselves .Me myself and I are the only ones lots of people care about .To hell with the rest of the world .So much for love they neighbor.
As many of you know YEARS ago we had a very beautiful but sad and hallow little 15 month girl come to us who needed a family that would love her and protect her from her own family.She was brought to us by someone in her family ,it was only going to be for a night or two until they could figure things out .well it turned in to her beinging with us till she was 3 and a half ! They all knew she was with us, but they all went on with their lives .We took it day by day helping her with all her emotional problems she had to work through. making her whole ,just like children should be . She was ours and we were hers life was great ! she had parents who loved her grandparents great grandparents aunts uncles ...a whole life ! She ruled the house "mommy and daddy" did anything she wanted and most of the time it was dress up and snuggles .A great life .
we started to move on and away just knowing that the bio family would not care because they had always been able to see her but chose not to and when they did it was few and far between .except for one cousin who was young and we would go get her every week end.no one ever even asked about "our" baby when we would pick her cousin up. at the time we were young and did not know to take legal steps to protect ourselves (her included) .and NEVER thought that this family would ever take her away. Well we were sadly fooled .on a sad October 2nd they insisted that she come back that her mother was going to be a mother NOW why now and not before i have no idea .again being young and naive we allowed this to happen .It killed us ! They promised that her life would be so great now.I knew that was not going the be the case but no one in that family would help us .Sadly we had to let her go. She and her cousin were heartbroken ,we were devastated ! We never recovered . Pictures were always up in our homes now matter where we moved prayers were always said for those girls I cried every October 2cd I cried every birthday that passed.Never ! not one day! ever went by with out thinking about her . We were blessed with our wonderful boys ,and even that was bitter sweet because I just knew she would have been a great big sister ,laying in my hospital bed i thought of her missed her prayed for her.The one thing that our boys have always wanted to this day is a big sister .
Then My space came along and I got a hit from the family about 2 months ago saying that they have been looking for us for years ,that her life had not been good at all the mother was not who she should have been and would we like to see her and her cousin again .Now let me tell you I have always said that this HELL we went through was worse then having your child die because if God forbid your child dies you know that they are home with God ,not hurting not hungry ,not lost or alone ,you mourn them you want them but YOU know where they are .This was worse because I knew none of that for 10 years ! all I could do was pray that she was safe,and now they tell me i can see these girls we love and miss .Oh yes please !
we got to meet with them and have dinner .during this visit we were told that she was told several things over the years .we were dead, we didn't want her ,we had kids of our own so we didn't want her again . now lets do some thinking here they had not heard from us in 10 years! they had no idea if we had kids ,they were even hoping that we didn't when they found us we didn't so we would want her . and and my boys are only 6 ! there are years that we did not have children !
these people have messed with her little head for years ,passed her from place to place family member to family member her perfect mother came in and out of her life . we gave her pictures hugs and filled in parts of her life for her.it was a wonderful and sad evening all rolled into one.
After that night we were told that the family was all aboard with the idea that she would come back to us.That they would help this time . once again they were done with her ! they had even told her she would get to come here .but this time they said they would do it right they would work with CPS we could have rights ,she would be safe with us no one could take her again . i started to look for schools and bedroom things and counseling for her i told my friends and family it looked like she could come home !
this went on and on me hearing how things were going getting to talk to her being told that the family was getting the ball rolling. until Thursday ... that's the day i was told by the family that CPS wanted to talk to me that they were going to call me Friday or Monday .I was even given a name of a case worker who was going to call me after she talked to her supervisor . That's when i stopped hearing from anyone
well not being that young naive person i was 10 years ago i took matters in my own hands and called CPS . Boy was i surprised when i talked to the case worker she was not the name i was given by the way, she had not one clue who i was .Well she does now ! I told her all i was told she and i compared notes . she knew after our call that i was very well informed on this family and the past ,i was basically reading her case file to her .
I told her that i was getting the feeling that the family member who contacted me thought that they could just drop her back on me like they did 10 years ago . she agreed . i was told that they were not going to remove this now 13 year old from the home that the family was going to work "a program "and that they were going to monitor the family . I gave her my name and number and told her that when and if CPS decided to finally remove her that yes we VERY much would love to take her back .she was glad to hear that and would keep my number and gave me hers in case i ever had any more information for her as well .
all this was just for what ? fun? did this family member enjoy themselves knowing how hurt we were 10 years ago did they just think this was ok ? who knows . do i think that my little girls life has been hard and that everything was as bad as i was told? yes, to some degree or another i do . Do i know why i was led on like this no i don't .
i am now just left again hurt ,broken ,devastated but now it is worse because instead of not knowing how bad things are or where she is .I do .
and i cant do a damn thing about it because the family is going to "do a program " with CPS . so i just have to sit here with this information on my heart and not have contact once again. because i do love her i understand that at 13 this is all very hard on her as well . until the next time they decide to poke a stick at me .
MERRY FREAKING CHRISTMAS

this is so neat ! SAVE THE TA-TA'S !

Pink+Glove+Dance+for+Breast+Cancer

our girls

fill in

Well we are now into the 2nd week of Sunday school and all is well .I have about 12 kids. Most of them dont really speak English that well .I can even begin to tell you how much I wish I had listened and taken Spanish
I have been doing the normal Leslie things subbing at the boys school,doing the SUPER mom thing, taking kids here and there,Sunday school,tutoring, daycare oh and becoming OLD !
I have not decided if I am really going to have a birthday this year. 39 sounds SO old 29 is where I should have stayed it was a great 3 years.BUT no I had to move on and now it is a down hill slide ! going to fast to stop now . I'll miss most of you when I'm gone, but when you think of me think of the young years the cute curly headed kid .

THE PINK EYE

well today was the first day of Sunday school (CCD),but not for us .I tried to call and email the director but got no response .I left voice mails on her and the asst directors line and heard nothing .I have yet to get a list of my class or know who my children have for a teacher so i think that with all of that and THE PINK EYE we were destined to stay home .I will call this week and talk to a live human being (i hope) and find out what is going on .
I know that they are short on teachers and that the students they did have were not as many as years in the past ,but i think that happens when you get new faces taking over.
Who knows ,I will fill you in when i know

why why why

First thing first
Daddy is not coming home until Sunday night late he has been working working working and has only had a little fun but hopes that Saturday he will get to go out and about.
I will post pictures and fill you in on his trip when he gets home
~~~~ OK when he left we had two boys with the flu and thankfully neither he nor i got it (knock knock) now that he is about to come home J has what CJ calls "THE PINK EYE"
I guess its is like THE walmart .
I got him started on his medicine tonight and i was getting on the computer to find out how long after the medicine starts is he contagious because we start our Sunday school this Sunday and i teach so.....
who knows!
well i am going to run away and try to go to bed

bye bye baby

Sunday night we took daddy to the airport and we stayed with him till he had to go to security .he called us when he was boarding to say goodnight and good bye ..... then he called an hour later to say the the bathroom door hinge on the plane was broke and they had to fix it before they left ....then 15 minutes later he called to say that as they were on the run way waiting for said hinge to be fixed someone had passed out and they were now taxiing back to the gate because that person needed help and they should leave "real soon " per the pilot
well they left at 9:05
this may sound a bit bothersome ...but it meant that he was probably not going to get to LAX in time for his next flight to Australia .he originally had a 2 hour lay over but that got eaten up real fast .He had me call around to see what he could do about his plight and what if he missed his flight (i rhymed ) well i found out he was SOL because the next flight was Monday night at 11:00 and he had to get off his plane and over to another terminal that he would have to catch a bus for and the likely hood of that was next to nothing they said . all of this is going on and him with out a cigarette .GRUMPY!
well they held the other flight about 30 minutes and had a special( no not little) bus come get them and drove them to the international flight .so he made it ! he called me when he got on board and said that he entered on the wrong floor of the plane and got to use the SPIRAL staircase to get to his lower level . fancy !
he said he was "give out" and was going to sleep because here it was midnight /1:00 .
I talked to him at 5:30 /6:00 today and they had just landed.safely.we talked at 8:00 and he was at the hotel he took a shower and was going to a lunch meeting .The boys thought it was cool that it was only lunch time .
So he is off to a full day and we will hope to talk to him sometime tomorrow

Halloween time

The boys made it very clear that daddy HAD to get the Halloween decorations out and HAD to do the front porch like he does every year before he left.now we can spend all next week doing the inside of the house so when he comes home it will all be done
I also think that it will be good to keep them busy while he's gone
"working"
ok the flamingo and overalls need to be moved but you get the idea

my jack-o-lantern

cough cough sniff sniff

Huck wont wear his -you watch the next flu we gwt is going to be canie of D.O.G1d1

How mant days till Christmas

85
Days
2
Hours
47
Minutes
...But who's counting?

man these grapes are sour

oh my oh my
why does stuff like this happen to us ?
so CJ and i went to the doctor today thinking that we would get a strep test and hear why yes that is what he has Mrs Humphrey you are correct .ok i was thinking that i would hear that .CJ not so much
but did we hear that ? noooooo
we heard well... he tested positive for the flu !
oh and because he has asthma look out for this and this and ...
not that the flu could ever arrive at a good time but could it have at least waited till hubby was gone safe far away... ya see hubby is going to AUSTRALIA
thats right
he is going for "work"
he leaves the 4th and returns all rested on the 11th .why yes he does miss our anniversary
why yes he will miss the most grumpy week of my little life 2 sad kids missing daddy one sick one properly on his way to flu-ville and me not too far behind them .
Hubby ,well he will be on the beach, in a pub , or some other less grumpy place then me .
October has so many things for us our anniversary his birthday my birthday, last year he got to play in golf tournament at some great golf course ...so fancy so cool great celebration for October .this year he leaves a grumpy house and goes to AUSTRALIA!
some people!
dont worry i will post all his fun picks as he emails them to me
LUCKY DOG

funny photos

we really do have 2 beds and plenty of pillows
yep he's stuck

look we do have another dog and isnt she pretty

cute baby dance

http://www.parentdish.com/2009/09/23/all-the-single-babies-if-you-like-it-then-you-shoulda-but-a-bi/?icid=mainaimdl6link3http%3A%2F%2Fwww.parentdish.com%2F2009%2F09%2F23%2Fall-the-single-babies-if-you-like-it-then-you-shoulda-but-a-bi%2F

ImageChef.com Poetry Blender

Life lessons

So J and hubby and I were in the living room the other night just enjoying a show together and J says "daddy wouldn't it be great if you found a big check written in pencil that you could erase their name and put yours ?"Hubby says no because it would be wrong ,that is someone Else's money and maybe they needed that for food or lights and that they worked hard for that money and J kept saying that it was written it pencil so you could just make it yours not theirs .hubby kept going over the Rights and wrongs and the whys of the situation ,I then said it would be better if daddy work said daddy you do such a great job and work so hard that we are giving you a big check written in ink with your name on it .
so thinking that we have corrected the problem and have him understanding we asked him "Now what would you do if you found a big check written in pencil " and he promptly told us that he would write his name on it because the people wouldn't know that it was theirs because his name would be on it and if was so important to them then they should have written their name in pen.
ok so now we all know not to leave our check book out around this kid.
you have all been warned

I should have left the smelly dogs

We had a very relaxing weekend we played around rode bikes pushed little boys on the swing and didn't even have to heat the house up on Monday by cooking inside. hubby grilled . there is nothing better then grilled pork chops (mainly because i didn't have to cook them )

I had plans to wash the dogs all weekend but finally got around to it yesterday ,and as i was about to walk out front with a dog my dad called and asked me to come up to braums for ice cream ,being the responsible pet owner i am (cough cough) i passed on the yummy cold ice cream .That's where i went wrong NEVER pass up ice cream kids ! I should have left the dogs smelly because before it was all said and done i fell UP the porch and did a lovely number on my leg ...took some skin off... left a bruise or two knocked over a planter and almost cut up my face on an aqua globe( no they don't work) There all in front of J and hubby ,and if there was ever any doubt that the little red headed kid is mine ...rest assured he is because instead of saying

OH mommy are you ok, poor mommy can i help ?

no not him he laughed at me

yep he's mine the proof is in the laughter

first week review

Well the first week was a success ! We have work out the carpool lane in's and out's .Those are always fun till everyone learns how they are supposed to do it.We have three first grades this year and then at least 2 second and 2 third so that make for a lot of parents wanting to get to their kids.
Both boys had a great week with no problems,they got to play with their friends from last year and they only have 3 or 4 new kids total so they know everyone.They have teachers who are enthusiastic about teaching and seem willing to work with us.
We have been doing homework all summer so we started doing homework on the 2nd day with only minimal gnashing of teeth and tears .I have a dream that we will not have to argue everyday about homework.It is not that they don't know it or that it is hard ,I just have to say the word and it makes them go into fits ,even if i say it at night or on weekends .It must be one of those auto responses that scientist have been doing research for years and years .you know one of those great unexplained mysteries of the world .
Here's to another great week next week.Let me know if you hear anything about a homework break through

First Day

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Busy weekend

We had such a busy weekend!
Friday the guys went to Abilene to see their Godmother,i stayed home to do the daycare thing .When they got home I went with my sister,her hubby and oldest son to see JOURNEY ! At winstar in OK. It was great !I loved seeing the women my age that were wearing the same outfit they had worn to the last journey concert they had gone too ,when they were 150 pounds lighter !It was a hoot .Good time Great music
Then Saturday we went to the circus with the in laws.the boys love it we try to go every year ,we join the summer reading program at the library and if they read all the books they get a free circus ticket as a reward .Well worth 25 books . If i can ever figure out how to get the pictures off my phone and on to here then i will gladly share

Journey is an American rock band formed in San Francisco, California, in 1973. Their hits include a series of power ballads and rock songs, including "Don't Stop Believing", "Any Way You Want It", "Faithfully", "Open Arms", "Send Her My Love" "Separate Ways", "Wheel in the Sky", "Who's Crying Now", "Stone In Love", "Lovin,' Touchin,' Squeezin;'", and "Lights". The group enjoyed a successful reunion in the mid-1990s with a major Grammy-nominated hit, "When You Love a Woman." Throughout Journey's three decades of existence, their albums have achieved gold status twice, platinum status three times, multi-platinum plateau eight times, and Diamond one time. They had 18 Top 40 singles, six of which reached the Top 10 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart. Their signature song, "Don't Stop Believing", is the top-selling catalog track in iTunes history, at more than two million downloads. According to the Recording Industry Association of America, Journey has sold 47 million albums in the United States, making them the 28th best selling band of all time. Their worldwide sales have reached 80 million albums. A USA Today opinion poll in 2005 asked respondents to weigh in on who they thought was the best American rock band in history; Journey came in fifth place.

too close

We are way too close to school starting ! I have no clue where the summer has gone !

I remember when i got to sleep in for most of the day and then ride my bike to the pool or over to a friends house .sit around all day .it was great ,what a life ! now the only chance i get to sleep in is on the weekends and that is still interrupted .so i don't think it counts . i would gladly go back to the whole summer off . you would not hear one argument from me . now my mom might be a little upset that i moved back in with my kids and husband in order to get the summer off...

A hero has fallen

Many of you may know that Billy Mays has passed on to the great infomercial in the sky .What you may not know is that J idolized him ! He would pause the TV so i could come see the next wonderful thing i could not live with out .He loves commercials ,the one about the purse ,the weight loss pills the acne-be-gone,the mini burgers but his first love was oxy clean! I had not told him that Billy(as we are such fans we can be on first name bases)had died .I was hoping that i would not have to ,but he was on my lap one day while i was surfing the net and the head line said Billy Mays dead at 50 .As he read it you could tell he didnt really get it and i just clicked past it really fast .well last week he came into my room and very irritated said that he had just seen a oxy clean commercial and it was not Billy Mays talking! I asked him to come sit with me and explained that he had died and reminded him about him reading the aol head line then the tears started ,he told me that it made him very sad and he was sad for his family . He was up set because he would not see him on his show and he would not see him all the time on the commercials either, you know how it is when you cant see your best friend again .then a light came on above his head and he asked how old i REALLY was (i tell them i am 99) i told him and he asked how close to 50 that was ,i lied and said very very far away.i understand that when he sits down he thinks that out it will bring up all kinds of things too,but i am still in denial about it myself . I hugged him and told him that we needed to say a prayer for the Mays family because even though he was missing Billy alot and was very sad his family missed him more and they were really sad .He hugged me and i asked him if he thought that he would be ok he said yes then got down and went into his room and cried again .
Now this next part will make the other two men in my life sound cruel but i assure you that only one is being mean ...
daddy and CJ have told him a few times that he could be the next Billy Mays and be on TV too this of course brings up all kinds of things and tears for him and we start it all over again.Yes i have very sternly told them to knock it off ,and reminded them how they would feel if say the driver of a favorite monster truck would die or a maker of say a favorite cigarette would die .so I have high hope that this will put and end to all the Drama they create

theses top two pictures are of CJ and his Golf teacher at his golf lessons he started yesterday

these bottom two are of the "guys" hitting balls with my nephew

Daddy is so happy that he HAS to go to the golf course ,because it is ALL to help CJ better HIS game.

what a great giving dad

90 minutes, GONE!

If you need to know how to waste 90 LONG minutes of your life ,just ask one of my little guys.

He called his brother a dummy .So he had to write sentences.No mother i did not give him so many that it took all of that time to complete them.In my house you have the pleasure of writing one sentence per year that you are . So that does in fact mean that those 6 little sentences took 15 long loud sad torturous minutes to do .

Because i am so tired of the name calling and telling people to go to their room or spanking or any other ways that i can show that i am

"the meanest mommy in the whole wide world"

I decided to let the other brother pick the sentence that would be written .

the choices were

--my brother is a gift from God ---

I will not say hurtful words to my family ---

(or the winner) -I will treat my brother with love and respect

yep those 9 little words took one minute and 6 seconds to write

EACH.

I know that you often need to know how to waste all that extra time you have in your day .SO now you know. just have the meanest mommy in the whole wide world

not much

Not much going on here.I have been sick ,hacking up a lung or two .Yes i am taking my medicine .Still sounding like i have been smoking for my whole life . J has had a runny stuffy nose too but it seems to go away with allergy medicine .So i think it is all these lovely ozone days we have been having.CJ has been fine so far we stay inside in the afternoon and go ride bikes in the morning and then in the late evening after dinner . They have been taking swim lessons ,going to movies and the library with the day care kids .we have just been keeping busy .Yes i have been the mean mommy and made them do school work every day . I just keep seeing that Sylvan commercial over and over in my head ,about them loosing 2 months worth of information over the summer . J is done with track it was too hot.It was from 6-8 monday -thurs and between me being sick him getting sunburn and the heat it was a pain to get him to go .He was sad at first ,he wanted daddy to bring an umbrella and keep him in the shade all the time,because he really liked it.When that was not going to happen then he didn't want to go .
CJ starts golf in July so i will let you know how that goes .tiger woods look out !

track star

Here's our little track star .He is staying in his own lane now so that is a plus .

late news

The "guys" went out to ride bikes this weekend and found a turtle under my car .I guess that with all the rain he got washed away from somewhere .We took him to the creek behind the school and he dashed off.Happy little turtle again .

here are some pics of how bad the storms were here

not so lonely

I am not so lonely

I do not miss the noise

the slamming, banging

running, barking ,yelling hooting and hollering.

the smell is gone

the peace has come

I know its not for long

I know it will end

someone will come

tears and runny noses will flow

the camp out will be over

about the time I lay my head down to rest

the back door will open someone will yell

MOMMA!

or Mrs.Humphrey!

I want to come in!

make up the cots

pile up the blankets on the floor

find the snuggle buddies

settle down once more

then I'll stop and look around

nope not here

then I'll go look and there he'll be out in the tent all alone

lucky Mr Humphrey

Kids fest

so today was the first field trip we took with the daycare kids .we went to the kid fest the city put on . they had booths, games, bounce houses and food . i don't know what i was thinking it would be like but all the people that were there was amazing .i was hoping that all our buddies from school and the block could go around with us ,but there was just too much . i think we will have to have a more controlled environment to make that a success .so they just went with their parents and had fun . i gave everyone a calender of things we will be doing all summer in hopes that they can come along so they can all keep up over the summer .even if they don't get to go with us at least they know the fun free stuff to do. it was fun to see how many of our friends came out to play i hope that we can have several come along for a lot off our things .we have 2 friends from pre k and 2 from kinder in the daycare and any friends that come along is bonus .

one of the moms on the last day said it would be neat if they were friends all through school ,i never thought of it till she said it . big C grew up like that, i didn't get to .i made a life long friend in 6th grade ,we still get together ,but never from kinder.it would be neat

Last day

For all of you that couldnt make it ,here, share in the cuteness.

Humphrey tattoo shop

Tuesday is tattoo day at school .As much as this kills me ,cause I do not like them I let them put a total of 13 on heads, arms, legs ,necks.They hope to have the most in their class

I see my future lawn boys

Make a Smilebox postcard

Hang loose

Today is Hawaiian day at school .J and i had problems with this yesterday and today because he kept telling me " momma, i am telling you the truth for real life Hawaii boys don't wear shirts !" no when you say that add his little lisp and it is even cuter .Yes that is a muscle shirt under his luau shirt that way he can feel like he has no shirt on when he gets hot and yes he has his swim trunks on CJ did not want to wear his ,i felt for sure he would they are after all gravedigger ones .but he never does what i think he will .That worries me on some levels because i think he will go to college and be a successful man so if history repeats it self then he goes with the same theme he has been then that means he will a band roadie with tons of tattoos.

--p.s. don't you love the shoes ! 9.00 walmart--

really i do

No this is not really a picture of my desk.

I was too ashamed to take a real picture of my desk .

Besides in this picture you can see the desk ,

in real life you can only see the monitor and keyboard .

I have plans ...great and glorious plans...really i do .

plans to clean it off

plans to not turn on the computer again till the desk is clean

really i do

but..

then i need to look something up

i need to reply to an email

need to email someone

i have big plans

really i do

My Mothers Day

I was woken up this morning to the sound of Huck puking up his guts and let me tell you no matter how loud it was I seem to have been the only one to hear it so thank you Huck for my first gift of the day .Then because when I moved out of my bed to clean up said gift CJ took over my spot in my bed so I got to go get in his . So when my mothers day officially started I was served breakfast in his bed.Toasters strudels with the icing spelling Happy M Day ,and CJ took the first bite for me.lol.

I got cute home made cards they wrote on with no apparent spell check (even cuter)

every year we plant flowers together and this year because Huck destroyed last years I got a huge wandering Jew and I split in it to two hanging pots and into window boxes and stuck some in a few pots that I am planning on bring in the house . Then I got to take a long shower some what undisturbed .Daddy took the boys to the park and when they came home we went to splash island . Had steak for dinner and the boys went to bed closer to on time then they have in a few days . so here it is only 9pm and my computer time is done !

it was a great day so relaxing with just my guys and me .

Mothers Day

Mothers Day

Is the day that as a child you are supposed to dote on your mom.

make her cards

cook her dinner

give her gifts

I think of mothers day as a day that I thank God

for the blessing of being a mother.

Yes I know that it is hard work and other then this one day we as mothers don't get the thanks we deserve all the time,but there are those times you hear

momma you are the best momma i have.

or

man momma you cook the best

...even if it is just popcorn at the time .

I am not saying that i wont gladly take the gifts ,cards or dinner

but as long as it comes with the all the rest,yes even the

you are the meanest momma i have !

last week

I know i am cheating and doing a week all at once instead of every day per event but it was a really busy week .We went to the zoo on their birthday fed some birds not some tigers .had a literature festival went as humpty and hickory ,learned to ride our bikes with our training wheels and avoided eye contact with the neighbor because we owe her new flowers

party pictures

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Make a Smilebox slideshow

Tonight I put 5 year olds to bed